In This Life

I've been to paradise, but I've never been to me.

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Missing Ending

Don’t mention about things that we did in that city any more. Cause it would only take me sufferings of missing. Those memories are hard to repeat.


Speaking Languages

One should own at three languages. The first one, and of course the basic, is his native language. Besides, it would be best if he knows two foreign languages. Use one fluently and at least know some basic points of the other one. That’s what I think.

Unluckily, I didn’t do what I always said. I use Chinese as my native language. And from the time of middle school, I began to be in touch of English. In college, I suddenly wished to study the other foreign language. I tried. There are so many Latin vocabularies in chemistry and biology science. I was curious and interested. So, in class, I learned Latin for a semester. For English is the international basic language which everyone can speak, I even more wanted to learn a different practical language. So, on holidays, I learned Japanese by myself. How I wished I could I get them!

It’s a pity that I never persisted. Days passed while I didn’t come into to door of the think books yet. Books looked like new all the time. I got little.

So that, I could never drive languages skilled and gracefully. I can use the Chinese language. That’s my duty. But for English and Japanese, I could only speak some words out.

A book called Standard Japanese Language is on the bookshelf.

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As we learned world geography, we were told that the American people like movement. Americas always move to another city with the family every two or three years. It means they must change work and houses frequently. They don’t stay at a company till they retire. They like innovation.

Compared with them, we are so conservative. Chinese people love stable environment. Employers don’t like employees who like job-hopping. We need loyalty and devotion from other people. It somehow means we lose senses of security. And we have a strong system called “hukou” which restrict our changing residence. Our education tells us to keep with the present situation.

It’s not easy to tell why the Chinese government doesn’t allow citizens to make a move. It’s also not easy to tell what influences to take after people change working places and houses. However, people are always educated to stay with family and work at a company permanently. Even though they can’t get what they should have got, why? For better conditions, they have the right to make a change.

It’s not guilty. It’s not immoral, either.

I’m considering movement. For living conditions, for career, for study, or for… Anyway, maybe I should consider it two years ago. I think about what on earth is my need. And what on earth I got? It’s hard to say it.

You must be an insider. If you want to know it all really. Earlier, it’s good to be in such an industry, such a company and such a city. Before really in it, I thought it like this. But now, the facts prove it fake. With no alternative, I have to change from inside of myself.

Or, I would go into mediocrity. Though the positive effects may not come right away. The trend is satisfying. It just need carrying on.

Last night, a friend asked me whether I was keeping with the blog. “Yes, absolutely!”, I said.

And he asked “Does she love you and reading your posts?”

I just said ”No!”