I’m listening to a song of Sarah Brightman, So Many Things. And I know there are so many things waiting for me.
Unexpectedly, in the last semester of university, I have so many things to do. I didn’t anticipate its difficulty. I’m not ready for it. I am still worried when I face these things. I don’t know any exact plan. I have ideals, but I don’t know how to realize any of them. I’m too sad right now.
I’m still hunting for a job. A so-so job which brings me not too many salaries or high social position is hard to get. I don’t want much. I just need a job at present. I want to find a job and get ready to do it well. But it seems I’m not good enough. No company or organization has an interest in me. They even didn’t give me a chance to take the interview. It sounds very ugly.
I think I’m excellent, at least competent for a position. But few HR managers agree. That’s the point. I’m struggling. I have to be.
And I’m busy with my graduation work. I must finish my graduation essay and internship report soon. But I can’t do it now. I can’t concentrate on these paper works when I think about the job. I can’t make my heart quiet. So many things have been upsetting my mind.
Out of question, I’m tired. Furthermore, I’m a little bit frustrated. Some told me to be self-confident. I know it’s important. I will always try to make it. But what I need most is a job which could smooth my painful heart. I’m looking for some good suggestions. I’m looking for someone who can encourage me.
I don’t want to be weak.
P.S. So many things have made me not have much time to write entries to post what I think and what I need.